OK we are out and about again and for the love of me, I cannot figure out how to delete CXP draft number three to compose this entry. Anyway last night and yesterday were absolutely amazingly interesting. I don’t talk about it often but I lost my dad 12 years ago to lung cancer and tomorrow would have been his 79th birthday. I was going about my day normally as I call my mom because I don’t like going upstairs every time I need to discuss something-anyway I asked Siri to call mom – she proceeds to try and call my dad two times – I think/I know it was his way of communicating with me because shit like that don’t happen on a regular basis. So I screenshot The message and shared it to my Facebook just because I wanted to keep it as a memory. Last night was the Coca-Cola 600 and there was a rain delay of 90 minutes or so which means that I did not get to see the whole race thanks to my kids wanting to go to bed. Woke up this morning feeling refreshed both energywise and emotionally which means today is going to be a kick ass day. I’m going to knit I am going to drink coffee I’m going to do what I do every day which is just be awesome. I have several entries in draft that must be edited and scheduled/published. I walked all the way over to Exxonmobil to grab some snacks just because I needed some outside interaction with other human beings. Definitely looking forward to this quarantine/captivity/stay at home order to be over-I know it’s lifted in some places in the nation and there are some counties in my home state that are lifted or moving towards being completely lifted. If I could live anywhere right now, it would definitely be the Carolinas just because they have the governors that are #WeThePeople versus dictator ship governors who are overreaching. I think I spoke about last night earlier in this blog-I am going to edit and publish some drafts I have and look for some articles I can share in the future. I still have some things to say about the cosmetics industry just because my brain never shuts off about it since there’s still always going to be controversy regardless if we’re in a pandemic quarantine or not. Oh Em Gee, #JeffreeStarCosmetics #JaclynHillCosmetics. Both are continuously surrounding themselves with controversy. Just when it’s “safe“ to purchase a product from them if you’re in their fan base still they decide to start something else up. I have not purchased anything#JaclynHillCosmetics since she launched her own cosmetics line which is backed by Morphe even though there is denial with that some people believe that it is #Morphe cosmetics with a Jaclyn Hill Cosmetics label. Anyway the new restock of #JeffreeStarCosmetics in a smattering of different items will be restocked on June 12 – sorry not sorry but I will not be partaking in any of the new products. I do not plan to purchase any more of his product because through this pandemic his true colors have come through and they are ugly colors that I do not choose to support. In the month of June I look forward to hopefully getting out of the house more often even though I don’t do that more than once or twice a day I still look forward to going to different places and seeing my friends etc. mixed messages do I send them? It could be possible because I support the quarantine in some aspects but in others I do not support it because not only is this pandemic taking lives it is taking livelihoods. And depending on your governor/dictator you are being told what you can & cannot do. I am going to talk a little bit about my personal life or lack there of it is not been affected too much by this pandemic because I am not in a serious relationship or any type of relationship I do have friends that I talk to but nobody has stepped up to be more than friends and am I OK with that yes but at the same time I feel like I may be ready for a relationship. I am not getting any younger. OK hanging out at home after a busy busy birthday where my dad would’ve been 79 years old today. I am knitting, I am listening to #SoggyDollarRadio. During my walk this morning, we ran into some french fries and a twizzler hanging out in the parking lot of the mall. Yes there’s been a lot of junk trash bullshit crap on the grounds everywhere in the Township and everywhere I go. It’s disgraceful that people are using the quarantine to make a mess just like they do when there’s no quarantine they don’t pick up their shit anyway I am currently working two scarves on my #SmartStix Circular needles from knitters pride. I am in love with these needles if they were a guy, they would be perfect. Speaking of guys, I am talking to a few and nothing serious anywhere but quarantine has made me realize that I may be ready for a relationship if I can find Mr. Qualified. I know I can be a stick in the mud bitch at times but over the past few days I’ve had a negative attitude and I figured out why this morning. I’ve gained 10 pounds and my hormonal balance is fucked up again so I have to watch what I eat watch my sugar intake etc. because by my birthday-my 43rd birthday – I want to be 160 pounds. It’s hard to believe that I am going to be 43 years old in November honestly I thought I would be farther in life than I am but apparently my path in life is not what I had thought it was going to be. I’m not married I do not have human children and Innoway I’m thankful I don’t have children because I personally don’t think I have the patience for a human child I don’t have patience in general very often. With my anxiety,Asthma, autism, cerebral palsy, comes OCD and a plethora of other things we have not identified yet. What’s really fucking annoying about asthma is that the signs/symptoms very much mimic the coronavirus COVID-19 so every time I mention something on social media about my asthma, someone is ignorant and says oh Em Gee you have corona virus, no I fucking don’t. I love having my own website because I can post pretty much any fucking thing I want to post. There was something I wanted to share on Facebook this morning about coronavirus and statistics but I did not. The reason I did not was because I knew Facebook would flag it as “fake news as “untruthful“ – let’s put it this way, certain social media outlets don’t want the human population to know the truth and when I say human population I mean we may not be alone out there because they found life on other planets. Just throwing that out there general information. Yes my emotions have been on the struggle bus lately and before my dad said the obvious no doubt signs from heaven I was kind of depressed because of all the drama and bullshit going on in the country and around the world. I can’t stand it-I am a homebody 99% of the time but the fact that I cannot go see my friends or go shopping for things other than what the government says are essentialIt’s really fucking with my mind because there are things that are considered essential that the government doesn’t consider essential. When they put together the list of essential items and they closed the certain stores that may not have essential items on their list – they fucked over people who have mental health issues. There are places I shop to get things for my mental health keeping me sane that would be yarn stores that would be metaphysical shops and those are not included in the “essential“ places of business. Actually President Trump just made a mandate where he says that places of worship are essential and honestly they should not have been shut down in the beginning there should have been a plan in place where churches synagogue would have been able to operate under guidelines. Anyway I think I’ve rambled enough for now I need to get back to my work.